Just So Stooooopid!

Today, I read in an advice column, about a woman who had caught her boyfriend cheating on her three times. In the letter it states that she does not want to consult a therapist because her boyfriend won't agree to it, she can't leave him because she doesn't want to go back home to her parents but she beleives that if she gets the right advice, she just might make him realize that what he is doing is destroying their relationship. She loves him so much and she just knows that he will change.

Hmm. If I were an advice columnist, this is what I would have told her:

So you don't want to see a therapist because your boyfriend won't go, you don't want to move back home and you think you can change him. Well, of course you can change him! Everyone knows that you can change a man. It's easy! This is what you do: Sleep with all his friends. Sleep with every one of them and then sleep with their friends! Yeah, that's it! Sleep with everyone until you get yourself one of them top of the line STD's. Then you can sleep with your boyfriend until he catches it and finds out what he has when he goes to the doctor complaining about the red-burning-rash that won't go away. When he finds out what he has, he'll be a changed man all right.