Don't Go There

I have been going out of my mind planning this wedding of mine and Bello's. Had I known that it would be this stressful, I would have asked Bello to elope. BUT - I am also aware that I would have WIDELY regretted that choice and everyone that knows me, knows that decision would have ruled my life, making it a permanent dwelling conversation.

I have everything in control and it appears to be going smooth. The only problem is, I don't know whether or not I am suppose to have a wedding coordinator at the wedding. I didn't hire one because I didn't see it being very reasonable to pay someone hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars to plan my wedding for me when I could do it myself. Now I'm left wondering, "Who the hell is going to tell everyone that it's time for the cake cutting, time for the bride/groom dance.....?" Am I suppose to do that or was I suppose to hire someone to do that? FUCK, I am so confused!!!

And why are weddings so GAWD-DAMMED EXPENSIVE ANYWAY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! WTF?????

Sleepless nights are upon me and as much as I am looking forward to our special day, I just want to get it over with so that I can go back to normal and not have to worry about how I'm gonna pay the videographer, the photographer, the DJ, the hairstylist, the make-up artist, the seamstress.........